Just like all movies and series begin with a long disclaimer about not wanting to disrespect, offend, insult or outrage any feelings, communities, religions or genders; I too felt it would be wise to have my own disclaimer for this post. Here it is.
DISCLAIMER: This post is a rant. The Cambridge Dictionary declares that a rant is to speak, write or shout in a loud, uncontrolled, or angry way, often saying confused or silly things. There you go. These are my personal opinions based on my personal experiences and observations. If you agree with me, I’ll be very pleased, because who doesn’t like an echo chamber for validation and support. If you disagree- see the first two sentences. And as all good Disclaimers go- this post is not meant to insult, offend, outrage etc.
I don’t form my opinions lightly or casually. But once formed, I don’t change them easily either. Why should I, after all the thought, effort, reading and research that has gone into forming them? I am open to listening to a different POV but tend to reserve judgement. If that’s being bloody-minded or pig-headed, too bad. It’s like me and yoga or me and meditation, I have read and heard all the arguments in favour of both and I don’t even disagree with them. But yoga and meditation just don’t work for me. And I’m fine with it!! So, I don’t go around telling people that sitting in lotus position, taking deep breaths and saying a mantra is wrong or futile. And I don’t need well-meaning talks on how beneficial they are, thank you very much.
Back to my rant- the title itself could be triggering enough but there’s a reason why I call it Tyranny of the Eggless.
This began almost 30 years ago when I was a young mother of a one-year old, posted in a small town in Rajasthan. My neighbour was also a young mother, but of two. And unlike me, she was a local, a resident. But we became good friends, sharing confidences and time together. She had a son and a daughter. Her son was the younger one, not more than 3 years old and a bit sickly. The doctor had said that he needed better nutrition and prescribed an egg a day. She lived with her in-laws who were very upper caste and very conservative. And there lay the dilemma: the son and heir was not keeping good health but had to consume eggs to get better.
The mother-in-law who was a proper tyrant and could have walked into one of those saas-bahu serials, no questions asked, thus decreed that the child be given an egg every day. But, the egg was to be boiled only. A separate vessel was kept aside for the egg. A separate stove was given to boil said egg. The stove, the vessel and a plate were to be kept outside the kitchen, in the back yard. The egg was to be boiled, shelled and fed to the child; outside, and the shells to be disposed. Only then were the mother and child to re-enter the house. And this was my first close encounter with the tyranny of the eggless.
Over the years I did come across several people who were not egg-lovers. They wrinkled their noses or made gagging faces because of the odour, or they just about tolerated it as part of a dessert where it could be neither seen, smelt or tasted. Fair enough, I would think. To each their own. I wasn’t crazy about the eggy odour either. Nor the slimy, slippery texture of the beaten egg. But that was more because of the inconvenience it caused while cooking. Anyway, none of it stopped me from enthusiastically learning varieties of egg dishes and whipping and beating them into all my cakes. We as a family, firmly believed in the concept- Sunday ho ya Monday, roz khao ande!
Which possibly explains why it took me several years to figure out why some people did not consume eggs. It was not because of the taste, smell or texture, it was because the egg is (horrors!) non-vegetarian. Since my upbringing was in a set-up where no flesh is forbidden, this was a major ‘Duh’ moment for me. Yes, I really, REALLY was that gullible and ignorant.
After that there was no turning back. I came across some vegetarians who did not eat eggs, some vegetarians who did eat eggs and some vegetarians did not eat eggs except in a cake and some who did not eat eggs even in cakes.
Is the egg vegetarian or non-vegetarian: that was the question. So, I began reading up on this. Thanks to the internet, there was no dearth of articles and opinions for both sides. Having eaten eggs all my life, I did not want to find out that I had been unknowingly murdering and then feasting on unborn baby chicks, so it was a relief to learn that EGGS ARE VEGETARIAN! Well, not all eggs, obviously, just the broiler eggs that are available in shops everywhere.
Yes, eggs come from chickens so they qualify as an animal product. Then what about milk? Does it come from a unicorn? How about honey? Do bees not count as animals because they are insects? So much for that argument.
Next, eggs that are sold in the markets come from poultry farms. (Unless they are labeled free- range, organic or whatever). Poultry farms do not have roosters aka male chickens. They just have female chickens laying eggs. Ergo- these eggs are unfertilized. They cannot hatch into chicks. A hen can sit on these eggs for days on end and the only outcome will be a rotten egg.
To elaborate, a hen does not need a rooster to mate with in order to produce eggs. A hen starts laying eggs naturally once it reaches a certain age. It’s called ovulation! Like we women have periods every ‘bloody’ month -thank you Mother Nature-the biological cycle of a hen gets it to lay an egg every day or every other day, depending on its breed, nutrition and a lot of other factors. Now if this grosses you out then think of where milk comes from and why a cow produces it. And maybe consider going vegan. Hah.
Even eggs that are marked ‘farm fresh’ could come from a farm where hens are allowed to roam free but without a rooster in sight. These eggs would also be vegetarian, as in- unfertilized and unlikely to hatch.
That takes care of that argument. Now, there could be ethical reasons for not consuming eggs: like inhumane, unhygienic conditions that some broiler chickens are kept in, the exploitative practices of the commercial egg industry, selective breeding and culling of hens and many more. In my opinion, these points cannot be debated and if a person makes a conscious choice to go eggless because of them, more power to you! I enjoy my unethical omelettes and caramel custard too much to give up those sinful pleasures.
Some other reasons for people not consuming eggs could be allergies(?), just not liking the taste, being put off by the smell, health risks (cholesterol), tradition and ‘kalchar’ (my pet peeves!); none of which I am judging. Do bear in mind however that eggs are among the most nutritious foods on the planet. Google ‘health benefits of eggs’ and see! My motto is ‘Eat or don’t eat but let others eat’. Which brings me back to my rant. Finally!
Of late I’ve noticed the ‘eggless’ label on many food products which didn’t usually have them before. Especially the ones found in bakeries. And they are touted as though it’s something to be proud of. All desserts, cakes and pastries are marked with that ubiquitous green dot and placed with pride on all the top shelves. Look at us- we’re EGGLESS, they seem to declare with glee. Whereas those shameful products marked with red dots are cowering somewhere in a corners of the lowermost shelves, as if hiding from sight. One has to crane ones neck or bend double to locate them. Even cookies are eggless, we are reassured. Why?! Did we ask for eggless chocolate chip cookies? No! Then why are you offering them to me? Suppose I don’t want eggless chocolate chip cookies, I want regular, normal egg-based chocolate chip cookies- can I get them? No?! Why not?? Because you only have eggless chocolate chip cookies and my only choices are like it or lump it?! That’s taking away my freedom of choice and in my book that’s called Tyranny.
I remember walking into a newly opened bakery to check out what they had to offer. The owner beamed at us welcomingly and announced- “Everything we have is eggless.” It gave us great pleasure to inform him that we were not looking for eggless stuff, take joy in his nonplussed expression, turn on our heels and walk out.
My point, and that of this rant is this: if eggs are scientifically proven to be vegetarian; why are all those foods that used to be made with eggs now going eggless? And in such quantities that they have outnumbered those that were traditionally made with eggs? Even foods that were never made with egg are now advertised as being eggless. The other day I bought a packet of icing sugar from a nearby supermarket. And right there, next to the name and the brand were the words- Eggless. Yes, we now have eggless icing sugar. Because earlier, icing sugar used to be made of powdered egg yolk. Seriously?!
And if there are indeed many people who cannot consume eggs for the reasons listed above, why do their preferences take precedence over the ones of those who have no problems with eggs? Unless an egg-based cake is toxic, lethal or carcinogenic, I refuse to have an eggless one in its stead. No. Just NO! I totally understand the need for sugar-free sweets and drinks, but egg-free cakes and desserts? Why? Why this tyranny? Why are we- the happily egg- eating populace being forced to buy and consume foods that used to be egg- based but are now eggless? Why am I being deprived of my constitutional right to freedom of choice?
All the advocates of the eggless- may I suggest you turn your attentions towards factors that are actually health risks? Like cigarettes? Or polluted air? Contaminated water? Adulterated foods? And ‘Leave them eggs alone!!’
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